Yes, I'm Really Posting This On My Blog

Sorry for the writing hiatus. I'll come back, I promise.

In the meantime, I made this video about tacos. I'm not sure why the sound doesn't work.



It's been that kind of week.

Post-PDX Acknowledgments-- Police, Protesters, and A Really Big Dummy

It's been a long weekend.  After our Veteran's Day festivities at Occupy Seattle, a bunch of us went down to stand in solidarity with Occupy Portland on the night of their big eviction (smirk) as ordered by Mayor Sam Adams.  Full accounts of the night's events are found elsewhere, but before I get out of my Army dress blues and collapse into bed, I thought some acknowledgments were in order for the many characters on-scene in Portland.

Yeah, I'm in this picture.  Far left, in military uniform standing in front of the police.

To the Occupy Seattlites I rode with: thanks for the conversation.  Big thanks to Gabriel and Ken for driving to and from Portland all in one night.

To the Occupy Portlanders: thank you for the warm welcome.  You guys were great.

To the many dancers, musicians, and jokers milling around the encampment: thanks for keeping the atmosphere light.

To the proprietor(s) of Lotus bar: thanks for letting me use your bathroom.  Repeatedly.

To the "gentleman" who got in a heated argument with me about the movement, then stated that he would kill me were I not in uniform, then called me a dummy (it was written on a sign he was holding that he waved in my face) and forced me to walk away in disgust: I'm sorry your behavior was so unruly and disrespectful that it got you TASERed and arrested.  By the way?  I win the argument.

To the police officer who thought it was appropriate to take time out from keeping people safe in order to  yell at me for a minor uniform infraction: neither your sarcasm nor your penchant for harassment do honor to the uniform you wear.  I am confident that I wore my uniform with well-deserved pride, and I hope that someday you will too.

To the frightened hippie on the front line who helped me face down the police, even though tears were streaming down his face: sorry for squeezing your hand so hard.  I was scared too.

To the former Army Specialist in the Guy Fawkes mask who asked me to pin new "rank"-- a flower-- to his collar in military fashion: I have never been so pleased to "promote" someone.  Hoo-ah!

To the many police officers, male and female, who peered through their riot shields with near terror in their eyes: don't worry.  We're far more likely to hug you than hurt you.  Also, I was scared too.

To the man with the tattooed face who informed me his dog had been stolen and then gently told me "He was a good dog":  I'm sorry, brother.  I hope you find your dog.

To the horse who spooked and almost ran, having scented the tension in the air: easy, big guy!  Um.  I was scared too.

To my voice, which I seem to have misplaced after a night of continued chanting and shouting: I don't blame you for leaving, but please come back.  I miss you.

To every brave individual who stared authority in the face and said "I'm not moving": You are some of the bravest people I've ever met, and I am proud to have "held the line" with you.



To every single person who was in downtown Portland and helped ensure that last night's demonstration and police action ended peacefully and without violence: it doesn't matter which side of the line you were holding or if you were police or protester.  Your dedication to peace was awe-inspiring.

To Mayor Sam Adams, Mayor McGinn, and any other politician who dares to send our brethren in the 99% in riot gear to remove us from our adopted homes and infringe on our right to peaceably assemble: We cannot be divided and we cannot be silenced.  We are not here on your terms, but on ours.  We are the 99%, we are too big to fail, and we will not be moved.


I love you all.



PS: Not the guy with the sign that said "Dummy."  You actually suck and I don't love you at all.

Pics From #OccupyWallStreet, 10/13/2011

Thanks to Michael Sebastian Lux for the images.  I apologize for the poor picture quality, there was very little light in the park.

 10 protesters circle the Sukkah (the right half of the frame) while 5 huddle inside, waiting for police.

 The bright lights are the police moving in on their bikes, which were used as a barricade.  

100-150 demonstrators surround the barricaded arrests.  I am somewhere in that crowd, pointing my laptop at the arrests and giving running commentary to 2500 people who were watching the Livestream of events.

 The police await arrestees.

 An arrestee being loaded, limp and unresisting, into the police vehicle.

 The Sukkah, after being demolished by Park Rangers, is loaded into an official vehicle to be taken away.

I watch the jubilant celebration that erupts once the police leave.

I completely lost my voice in last night's events and am feeling tired and run-down.  I may stay home tonight but wild horses couldn't keep me away from Saturday's events.

Setbacks For Dan Choi: Judge Denies Use Of Selective Prosecution

A new development has sprung up in the ongoing case related to Dan Choi's arrest in the November 15th, 2010 demonstration at the White House fence, as Judge Lamberth today ruled on the government's attempt to block his legal counsel's proposed defense of selective or vindictive prosecution.  Prosecutor Angela George had previously filed a writ of mandamus barring the defense's use in this case, which Lamberth today acceded to and disallowed the defense in court.

Oh yeah, and I was there too.

From the National Law Journal (via Legal Times):

U.S. District Chief Judge Royce Lamberth, in issuing a writ of mandamus (PDF) to the presiding magistrate judge in Choi's case, ruled that such a defense theory should have been brought up pre-trial. Lamberth also clarified for the first time that a district judge can issue such a writ to a magistrate in the same court, in the same way an appellate court can issue a writ to a district court. 

Choi, a former Army lieutenant who was discharged in 2009 after publicly announcing he was gay, was arrested with 12 other demonstrators outside the White House in November 2010. Choi has been a vocal opponent of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, the military’s former policy barring openly gay servicemembers.
The other protestors resolved their cases through a deferred-sentencing agreement with the government. Choi declined the offer. 

U.S. District Magistrate Judge John Facciola has been presiding over Choi’s trial, which began on Aug. 29. It was halted, however, after prosecutors objected to Choi and his attorneys presenting a defense of selective or vindictive prosecution. 

According to the petition (PDF), Assistant U.S. Attorney Angela George learned shortly before the trial that Choi’s legal team planned to present a selective or vindictive prosecution defense. Such a defense theory, according to briefs, would point out disparities in how Choi’s case was handled compared with his previous arrests for protesting, and also how protestors who had gathered outside the White House were treated in the past.

This ruling represents a significant need for restructuring of the defense's strategy and I can't help but think that Judge Lamberth has acted in collusion with the government to hamstring an important court case with far-reaching implications on issues of free speech.  It is seemingly clear to many that he (and the rest of the protesters present by association with him) were victims of selective prosecution, and Lamberth's ruling provides a disturbing precedent for the government to prosecute demonstrators with extreme prejudice.

I've Been In Boca! Sunning Myself!

Sorry I've been out. I wish I could say that I have been sunning in Mexico while being doted on by cabana boys, but it just hasn't been the case. School started and I had a nasty breakup (that's the last you'll ever hear about Adam on here. GRADE-A JERK. Uh, except for that) so I've been couchsurfing (bleh!) while re-learning how to be a student. Blogging every day ain't exactly easy when you're not sure where you can find a wireless connection...

So that's been eating up my time, but I've managed to keep up with various activist-y things. Notably, I and a hero of the movement, Miriam Ben-Shalom, have elected to vacate our guilty pleas in the matter of our arrests with Dan Choi in light of allegations that have come up in his trial, which was written about by the Blade.

You can't walk two steps in college without tripping over a protest or activist event, and Seattle Central Community College is no exception. The Occupy Seattle protest happening currently in front of Westlake Mall is gripping the Emerald City's attention, and I joined a march on Friday that trooped from SCCC down Pine to join the "99%". It was a lot of fun. I love a good march.

So I'm going to try to delve back into blogging. Thanks so much for your patience, guys, it's been a long couple of weeks.

While I've been Out

I took a few days off, and some pretty explosive stories happened during those few days sure to enrage many of my readers.  Sorry I haven't been covering them.  I have been getting my school situation squared away as well as doing a lot of thinking about the repeal of DADT and how it affects my life and writing.  This means that some of the things I'll be putting up in the next few days you may already know about, so I will attempt to keep reiteration of obvious facts brief.  However, these are developing stories that have affected myself and many of you, and I would be remiss in not including them in the content on this blog, so bear with me as I jump into many of these crazy happenings mid-story.

DADT Ends, Ian Takes A Day Off

Today, Don't Ask, Don't Tell is history.  Clearly this has been a long time coming and something I've been working for for a long time, and so I'm going to treat myself to a day off from blogging.  I'm sure I'll master my emotions by tomorrow and have loads of things to bitch about at that time (to include the second-class status of gay military personnel).  See you tomorrow!

Countdown To DADT Repeal: Day 2

Tomorrow is the last day of DADT's existence, and Michael Bedwell, historian extraordinaire, reminds us of some of the more dire times in our nation's legacy of gay military service: the queer stockades.  When soldiers were outed as gay or lesbian during the WWII era, prior to the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy, they were subject to horrific abuses at the hands of military personnel.  Quartered in separate living conditions, they were treated as pariahs and basically were denied their humanity.

Michael adds:

Many abuses continued after the WWII ban became DADT, but they were rarely as bad as the earlier open air "Queer Stockades" like the enclosure in the top picture or the mental wards as in the second actual photo. Gays were often marched through gauntlets of ridicule, sometimes raped by MPs, and sometimes attempted or succeeded at suicide. In the 80s, locking them in closets for hours until they named names became the "funny" method of choice. 

While some in the medical profession urged even acceptance of gay soldiers as far back as WWII, the "they're not just sick but evil" mindset prevailed, and the depth of today's homophobia can be largely traced to the homophobic lectures troops received either during the war or in the years following, after a brief period of more benign attitudes. It reached its worst post war phase during the Reagan Administration when homophobia combined with AIDSphobia resulting in multiple horror stories about the treatment of those living either with HIV or with actual AIDS.

In a separate post on his Facebook, however, Michael links some of that culture of despair and suicide with one of our happier triumphs as a community: the adoption of a common symbol that links us all as one people in all our diversity.

Gilbert Baker, as a result of being rejected by his first love while in the military between 1970 and 1972, compounded with the homophobia he experienced while in the Army, attempted suicide... but survived.  He received an honorable discharge from the military, but afterwards became active in the gay and anti-war activism movements.  What did he bring to the table?  Creativity... and the ability to sew.

Eight years after his suicide attempt, he created the Rainbow Flag, the symbol for LGBTs the world over.  Since its creation, it has been reproduced thousands of times in a hundred different permutations, and is the most widely-known representation of our community.

Once, while I was serving in the United States Army at the Defense Language Institute in Monterey, California, myself and three other soldiers took a trip to San Francisco.  We went to the Castro, of course, being the young gay kids that we were, and our first sight of this mecca of gayhood was the massive Castro Rainbow Flag, on the corner of Castro, Market, and 17th.

We weren't in uniform, but we decided to honor our community in the best way that a soldier knows: I stood at attention, called my battle buddies into formation, and ordered "Present ARMS!"  We saluted that flag, and I like to think we brought that flag's history full circle; born out of a tragic experience of shame and homophobia in the military, the flag has come to stand for hope and renewal, an honoring of the ties that bind our diverse community together.  An ex-soldier with emotional scars set aside his pain and created a symbol, and we, as modern soldiers, honored that symbol and the warriors that have carried it in intervening years.

Perhaps these simple (and sometimes horrific) stories are the ones that really express what the struggle for acceptance for gays in the military has meant all these years:  tragedy, renewal, and rising in the face of the adversities brought to us through institutionalized discrimination in order to plant our flag and say:

We're gay.  Get over it.

Ian Awesome And The 2011 Seattle AIDS Walk

So I'm participating in this year's AIDS Walk here in Seattle.  Basically, it is a 5k walk or run that, should you sponsor me, will raise money for a local charitable organization called Lifelong AIDS Alliance.  Lifelong provides essential services (to include social work and food benefits) to people living with HIV/AIDS in King County.  I have made use of their services before and most likely will again, so please give generously to this very worthy organization.  Click here!  You can make a one-time donation for as little (or as much!) as you want.  Do it!

Oh, Shush, I'm Back

Sorry for the radio silence this week, guys.  I took a couple of days off.

Mwah.

Now Accepting Donations

Quick note-- if you like what you read here on OAQ and care to tip your hardworkin' blogger, feel free to click the "donate" button located under my ugly mug to the left.  You can make a secure payment through our PayPal and show your appreciation for the nonsense I sling on this here blog. 

We're not tax deductible, sadly, but if you do choose to donate, thank you!  You're ensuring that I'll be able to continue spouting my schlock.

You tip your waiter, why not tip me?  :)

xoxo

Ian Awesome

An Interruption

I'm moving to Seattle this weekend, and for the next week or so, posting might be sporadic to nonexistent.  It's at a most inopportune time, but I will try to drop in on the blog as often as possible to update it.

Love, peace, all that rot.

xoxo

PS: Here's a picture of me with some Vikings.  That is all.

Happy Anniversary To Me

I passed the one-year-mark of me spouting my bullshit to you guys on this blog five days ago without even noticing.  My first post of substance?  A rant about how Bono can't save Spider-Man The Musical.  Oh, look how the times have changed.

Since then I've passed many milestones, both personal and professional.  I admitted to my readers (and friends, which really just means all my readers at the time were friends) that I was a crystal meth addict.  I traveled to DC in order to take part in history and handcuff myself to the fence of the White House in protest of Don't Ask, Don't Tell.  I traveled to and attended Netroots Nation, where I learned that the blogging community is a tight-knit (if somewhat dysfunctional) family of misfits and, I must say, insanely intelligent people.

I laid bare my search for my missing friend Adam.  I found him.  Now I get to marry him.  Isn't love grand?

I've bared my soul and my curmudgeonly hatred of idiot politicians to you guys, and it's been a hell of a year.  

I can only hope for as exciting a year going forward, if hopefully one unmarred by personal tragedy.  I'm planning some great things, both in work and life, and can't wait to reveal them to you.  

I feel very blessed to have this outlet for my views and my thoughts, and even more blessed that so many of you read my read it.  Not only have I passed one year of blogging, but yesterday, my last post of the day was the 1,000th entry on this crazy train, and the fact that you guys have read 1,000 pieces of my schlock is touching and gratifying.  

Of course, not all of it is mine.  I have some great people who have guest posted on my site, and I thank them as well.  Your next pieces are due by Friday, or you're all fired.  

Just kidding.  Mostly.

So thank you, friends.  Even if I don't know you, you are all in my heart.  Whether you're a closeted bisexual gal just looking for a connection to the LGBT community or the asshole that made me do it, thank you.  All of you.  You are my extended but oh-so-dear to me family.

And keep reading.  It should be an exciting year.

Bachmann Says Some More Crazy Talk

Looks like Bachmann is starting to try both sides of the gay/anti-gay fence, with a recent interview on "Meet the Press" in which she refuses to address anything gay at all, instead bizarrely reiterating over and over that she is running for President:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Thanks Michele, for this exercise in pointing out the effing obvious.

However, evidently when she's not talking to MSNBC she feels perfectly comfortable talking about taking rights away from LGBT Americans, stating for CNN that she would "probably work" towards reinstating Don't Ask, Don't Tell:

But Bachmann, a favorite of the ultraconservative Tea Party movement, said she would revisit the policy if she reaches the White House. 

"The 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy has worked very well," she told CNN's "State of the Union." 

"I would be in consultation with our commanders, but yes, I probably will" reinstate the ban, she added. 

The ban was overturned in a law adopted in December 2010 that first required the top military officer, the defense secretary and the president -- who is also commander-in-chief -- to certify the change would not harm military readiness and that the armed forces were ready to carry it out.

I asked a friend, Jarrod Chlapowski, who is the Field and Developmental Director of Servicemembers United, what he thought on any efforts on the part of an imaginary Bachmann administration to hash this battle out again:

"Politics aside, I think any executive would have a difficult time reinstating any sort of gay ban in the military, let alone DADT. The public overwhelmingly is in favor of open service. The training is done; the honey is out of the comb. And the last thing any of the service chiefs want is to deal with an extended media spectacle over a reversal that would be unnecessary, harmful, and pure political theater."

Servicemembers United, you may remember, was involved in a landmark court decision ordering a halt to gay discharges, with their Executive Director Alex Nicholson being the plaintiff in the case.

I have a little bit to add to this, as I myself have been involved in the push to repeal Don't Ask Don't Tell.

Last November, I joined Dan Choi and 11 other patriots in standing up for what we believe in.  We went to Washington DC and chained ourselves to the White House fence in order to put pressure on the administration to back full repeal of DADT.  Did we make repeal happen?  I don't know that.  But I do know a month later repeal happened in an unprecedented push for equality in Congress, and I feel confident claiming my part in that narrative.

This in mind, I would like Michele Bachmann, in all her political theater and insane grandstanding, to consider this:  If you reinstate DADT, I'll be back.  I don't care how many times I have to chain myself to that fence, I will be back, and you will be in for a long, pain-in-the-ass ordeal and media extravaganza.

Do you really want this on your doorstep?

When I took the fence with my comrades-in-arms, America paid attention.  Do you want that level of scrutiny on your anti-gay politics?  Your recent interviews, essentially refusing to address your anti-gay past, would indicate you don't.  So don't screw this up for yourself, Michele.

Because we're watching you, and handcuffs really aren't that expensive.

Soldier Comes Out To Battle Buddy: "It's All Good."

A US soldier caught on film his friend's reaction to his homosexuality:




This was very similar to the reactions I got from people when I came out to them in private, though it was normally prefaced with "Duh," "No shit, Sherlock," and "You told me this yesterday."

Just Can't Keep A Good Blogger Down

Even though my brother died two days ago and I thought I was going to take the rest of the week off, I just couldn't stand the idea of sitting around on my ass today feeling unhappy.  I've blogged through some of the hardest times in my life, and today is no different.  Besides, my RSS feed is cluttering up with stories I have opinions on, so I'm going to do some posting today.  Happy Friday.

Various Administration Sheeyit

Yes, ads are back.  For the past six months I've been blogging with zero payoff or revenue, so if you see something you find interesting in the Amazon associate banners, feel free to click.  I make a certain percentage off each purchase you make through my Amazon ads, so peruse!

That's right, Coca-Cola!  I drank your swill and put a picture of it on my blog!  Now give me some goddamn money!

Also, a reminder:  the best way to find my work is to "like" my Facebook fan page or to follow me on Twitter.  If you scroll down, on the left side of the page you'll find widgets that allow you to do that directly from this page.

Lastly, I'm always adding new blogs to my "Required Reading" blogroll, so click on over to my various friends and colleagues and read their bullshit too.

Love, peace, hair grease,

Ian Awesome

HIV: Yes, There Are Still Consequences

HIV/AIDS infection rates have not slowed and are even speeding up in certain populations in the United States. The causes for the continuing scourge of HIV/AIDS in America are too many to list, ranging from widespread meth use to a mysterious lack of visibility in Hollywood of poz celebrities. I have always felt that prevention education is the key to halting the spread of the epidemic, but we see a disturbing trend of spending cuts and silence when it comes to prevention.

Part of the problem, of course, is that the picture of what prevention is supposed to look like isn't clear. The HIV/AIDS game is changing. People aren't dying of AIDS as often, with the leading cause of death among people living with HIV quickly becoming heart failure. This presents a unique challenge to prevention educators: HIV just isn't that scary any more, and it softens the message and impact of campaigns warning people from risky behaviors. Dan Savage, as I mentioned before, has very publicly stated that modern prevention is hamstrung by the pesky need to be factually accurate regarding the consequences of HIV in modern times to patients.

Regardless of his concerns, it's possible to tailor prevention campaigns to include the very real consequences of HIV that still exist. There are health concerns, financial concerns, and a slew of other problems that can discourage someone from unsafe practices.

So let's talk about them, shall we?

I have HIV. I tested positive on January 3rd, 2009, and it's been a pain in my ass since.

To start with, informing your friends and family about your serostatus can be insanely difficult. I ended up being the one consoling half the people I talked to, as they dissolved into tears, hysterics, etc., sure that I was going to die any minute.

Disclosure is still a necessary (and difficult) evil. At Netroots Nation, I stood up and disclosed my status in the LGBT pre-conference, primarily because I wanted to talk about HIV/AIDS issues, but also because I figured I would have hot activism sex and didn't want any awkward moments when I told my partners about the virus I carry. See? Mind like a steel trap, this one.

Of course, the big consequences are health related. While it's not likely that I will die of immune issues, there is a very big chance that I could die of cardiovascular disease. HIV, for some reason, hardens arteries and I must watch what I eat in response.

My greatest concern, of course, is my medicine. While there are great medications out there that keep my CD4 (think T-cells) high, they can have a drastic impact on my health. I'm on my second regimen, Isentress and Truvada, because my first one involved Norvir, which made me SICK. AS. HELL. I essentially spent two months alternately sitting on the toilet and vomiting every meal I ate. If I were to tailor a campaign about the modern consequences of HIV, it would probably involve this image:

My first regimen devastated my GI system so badly that even though I'm on a completely different regimen, I still cannot digest dairy. Really. A bowl of cereal in the morning can ruin my day (and everyone else's, yuk).

Lastly, medicine is fucking expensive. I take almost $300 worth of medication a day as part of my HAART regimen. Seeing as how I'm a broke-ass blogger, the government has to pick up the tab, and with drastic budget cuts to HIV/AIDS budgets being hung over our heads, it is not certain that I will always be able to afford the medication that keeps me alive. Even now, finding the funding to pay for my meds is a huge pain, with reams of paperwork being filled out and endless consultations with a myriad of social workers and bureaucrats.

In short? No. We're not dying off in droves. But if you don't want to possibly shit your pants while on a date or spend hours arranging insurance and comforting friends and family about your serostatus, don't get fucking HIV. It still really fucking bites.

Politics Are Fueled By Greed? What?! *sarcasm*

As if we needed any more proof that the political crusades to protect big business are founded in corporate greed, ThinkProgress reports that Senator Joe Manchin (D-WV) is fighting efforts to protect public health interests by further regulating the coal industry... all while making millions privately from coal.

"On his financial disclosures for 2009 and 2010, Manchin reported significant earnings from Enersystems Inc., a coal brokerage that he helped run before his political star rose. In the 19 months before winning his Senate seat in a hard-fought special election, Manchin reportedoperating income of $1,363,916 from Enersystems. His next disclosure showed $417,255 in Enersystems income."

I don't really need to say anything about this.  It's entirely obvious that voting in a candidate with strong private interest in damaging industries is a bad, bad idea.  

I know!  Let's pass a bill: the only people who can run for national political office must, by law, have a less than $100k/year income.*

*this post brought to you by the Ian Awesome for US Senate Campaign.

HHS Begins Revising Blood Donation Policies

I have become something of an irritant to Red Cross canvassers in downtown Seattle.  You can't go anywhere without them or Planned Parenthood hitting you up for cash, and while they're great organizations, they can be a real pain.  The poor guys who raise money for the Red Cross, however, are starting to learn to avoid me.  "Hi!  Can I talk to you for a minute?"  Cue Ian's finger-waving: "If you accepted my blood, I would consider donating to your organization!"

This is a bit of a douchebag move on my part.  I obviously cannot donate blood because I am HIV positive, and it's not necessarily the Red Cross' fault that the US Department of Health and Human Services bans men who have sex with men (MSM) from giving blood products.  It makes for interesting sidewalk discussions, though.

Those canvassers may have a reprieve from my one-man terror crusade, though, as the HHS has decided to study the issue further and consider revision of the rules to allow MSM to donate.  From the Gay Men's Health Crisis:

Gay Men's Health Crisis (GMHC) and the World Federation of Hemophilia laud the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) for outlining concrete steps toward review of the Food and Drug Administration's (FDA) permanent deferral on blood donation by gay and bisexual men.  In a question-and-answer document, HHS described four areas of necessary study to allow a further review of the existing policy, and implementation of the June 2010 recommendations from the Advisory Committee on Blood Safety and Availability (ACBSA). These areas include: How the risk of blood transmissible diseases in the current donor population relate to the risk factors in donors;  The root cause of quarantine release errors (QRE), the accidental release of blood not cleared for use that potentially put the blood supply at risk;  If potential donors correctly understand the current questionnaire and if men who have sex with men (MSM) would comply with modified deferral criteria; and If alternative screening strategy (e.g. pre- and/or post-qualifying donation infectious disease testing) for MSM (and potentially other high-risk donors) would assure blood safety while enabling data collection that could demonstrate safe blood collection from a subset of MSM or other currently deferred donors.

Well, it looks like I might have to revert to "I'm just really broke guys, sorry."